By: John Furnem
As most married couples know, there are natural ups and downs in every relationship, this article does not discuss the regular every day stress related fights and arguments between couples but a more serious situation where both partners are seriously considering divorce or are even at a point of starting a divorce procedure.
Some people do not believe that a broken marriage can be saved, I do not think that this is true, but then again I don’t think that anything is impossible, we all know numerous examples of people who have achieved incredible things, sometimes even in desperate situations, so I believe that we humans are capable of almost anything, and I definitely think that saving a marriage or relationship, and preventing a divorce are possible.
The first step in preventing an upcoming divorce is to strengthen the individual, this means that each of the partners needs to go into a phase of self healing and self rebuilding, it is this stage that will have the most effect on the way the partners communicate in the near future. This is the reason that the process of rebuilding your individuality is important, its basically the way that you will position yourself in front of your partner, and it will allow you to reshape your character and the way your partner looks at you.
This is why the first real step should be rebuilding ones inner strength and power, to redefine anything that is of importance to you life, and decide that you are your own person, that whatever may happen to you, successful or failing to save you marriage or anything else you set out to do, you will be determined to be happy, and healthy in your life, that the source of happiness and joy is exterior to relationships and accessible to everyone at any time, this kind of positive thinking will bring results once you believe in it and practice it daily, even a few times a day.
It may sound strange to you at this point, but this is the most important thing you can do for yourself at the moment, your partner is drifting away, and the last thing you want to project is a feeling of desperate need and dependency, this is probably a source of trouble in your relationship anyway, the work should focus on your own, independent happiness, as you work on that and take the time to reflect on the things that are your absolute top priority you will notice that this inner strength can help you reshape not only your character but also your relationships.
Another benefit from this inner self focus is dedicating your thought power and motivation towards getting better, towards happiness, joy and health. The danger of letting the power of the breakup and upcoming divorce events drag you down and obscure your mind from any positive thought and progress is what you should avoid, and what better way to do that than focus on getting better, stronger and healthier?
A good relationship is comprised of two, healthy and happy partners, try and remember this as you work to strengthen your inner self. Good luck.
